By Jullie Chaudhuri

24th April 2011...
What does this day mean to you...what does it mean to me...?
What import does it have cosmically...?
Different sentiments felt by different folks...yet, underlying it all is the fact that a colossal void is left behind.
Quite obvious, totally inescapable and utterly unavoidable is the oft gnashing pain to see the Beloved One again...

That piercing agony of separation was experienced by Dasharatha for Lord Rama...and that soul-searing parting was the cause of Ma Kaushalya’s supreme grief...so too, during the age of Dwapar…similar was the intense angst borne by Mother Yashoda and Nand Maharaj...

What about the sorrow and distress that plagued the being of Brindavan…the forests, the trees, tulsi/basil shrubs, the birds, the cows, calves and other animals…along with the woe of the mountain Govardhan and the humble anguish of the river Yamuna…?

And...what about the stinging soreness in the hearts of the Gopikas...and their copious tears?
Can any mortal measure the excruciating extent of their ordeal...?
Can anyone count the stars in the sky...or the leaves upon the branches of the Evergreen Trees...or the drops of water that makeup the mighty Oceans or the grains of sand upon the bosom of Mother Earth...? Can one weigh the amount of snow that make up the majestic Himalayas...or even attempt to gather the rays of the Sun or Moonbeams in their arms...?

Thus, what each devoted heart feels at the physical separation from the Supreme Being can never be gauged, determined or estimated...?

We all are a part of the Source...of Beloved Bhagawan, however, does life have any lustre, any flavour...when we are away and...apart from Him...?

Inexplicable was the torment in each brijvasi’s soul...ever so colossal…then, where does this partition place us all...?

Treta, Dwapar and Kaliyug…Rama, Krishna and Sathya Sai…Who can gauge the woe of a devoted heart...of an aspirant, of a devotee...of any person who was aware of Beloved Bhagawan as the solitary Mother and Father...the sole Parent - a gleeful child...up until 24th April 2011.
His Omnipresence notwithstanding, even in the midst of a crowd, surrounded by friends and family…the ‘gleeful child’ now faces life often alone as an orphan alone.

The lines from the qawwali often sung in the Divine Presence keep resounding –

Sai bin raha na jaaye...
Jabsey hai dekha Tujhko Sai merey...
Darsh ke pyase nayana saanjh saverey...
Chaen na aaye mohe chaen na aaye…
Sai bin raha na jaaye…

Oh! Beloved Sai...we can’t live without You... ever since these eyes first rested upon You...they have solely sought glimpses of You...through each moment of dusk and day... immensely restless are we...for Thee…do not turn away from us…Sai, we can’t live without You…there is no life without You...

Having experienced the Lord’s wondrous Presence,
…that mystique,
…that graceful gait,
…that charm,
…that compassion and sweet motherly interaction,
…that stern fatherly concern,
…that exclusive attention,
…that twinkling creative gaze and flow of inspiration,
…that personal loving touch,
…that pat on the back,
…that distinctly made up for any and every kind of lack...
…that Vision of Glory...
…that glorious vision...
...of curly locks and orange hues...of the petal soft Lotus Feet...
…of the coveted abhaya hasta...of the hand raised in bountiful blessing...
…that unforgettable voice...the songs He did sing...
…the unparalleled joy it brings...
…that melody that pierces the depths...the core...
…who doesn’t want more...much, much, much, more...?
Unabashedly i say – i do...i do...i do...want more…!

Omnipotence, Omniscience, Omnipresence is an eternal phenomenon...it always is and always will be...the intangible does give delight...we all experience it in perhaps every bit that does vibrate around us and that does swirl and surround us...yet, the elation...the exhilaration...the enchantment His Presence brings is matchless...His Presence has no comparison...truly exuding Beauty Beyond Compare...such is the buoyant bliss of the Beloved One’s Darshans.

So, have we recovered...? Has Prashanti recovered...can one ever ‘recover’...from an ‘episode’ of such a massive magnitude as this...? Oft a question surfaces - what does Prashanti’s stoic calm belie...do we ever get to hear her wishful sigh...for the soft footfall of her Beloved Sathya Sai...?

...and what of Puttaparthi...?

Mother Devaki and Mother Yashoda...both adored their Krishna. Puttaparthi and Prashanti...what do these ‘mothers’ feel for their precious ‘Sai...their little Sathya...their Sai Rama…their very own Sathya Sai Krishna...?

So many thoughts…feelings flow on...
…fluid sentiments gushing forth like a never-ending stream…
Memories swirl and beam…choosing to remain evergreen…
…and the heart does constantly, continuously reminisce…
Right now, the soul is aware of only this…
…His unfathomable mystery, mystique and mission is known to none…
His charismatic Persona endears Him to all…
His transcendental ways do baffle, amaze and stun…
He is the Creator and…
His script for the benefit of creation is supremely precise…
…intricately…ever so finely spun…

Right now, the soul is aware of only this…
His Will is that indomitable, absolute Power…
…that brought about creation…
…and…

His Word is the word of Sathya…of Truth…
…the Sathya of Sathya Sai always holds true…
…for His Word, you see, is the Word of God Almighty…
His Will, His Power, His Word…
…propels us on…shepherds us into…
…stimulating, fructifying, inducing a Glorious Genesis…

Right now, the soul is aware of only this…
…though the cosmic realms of the intangible renders bliss…
…without His Darshans…
…there is an invariable ‘something is amiss’…
Right now, the soul is aware of only this…
…the era of Sathya Sai has much more in store…
…a refrain reverberates in the depths of the core…
He is…and we are His…
He is eternal and infinite…
...and eternally, infinitely we are His…

Right now, the soul is aware only of this...
His Words are the Truth to abide by and cherish...
One day soon...
This Truth will forevermore humanity astonish...
Right now, the soul is aware only of this...
There is more...to the era of Sathya Sai...
...much fantastically more...
...much magnificently more...
...than this...
Right now, the soul is aware only of this...